Peter, my husband, is the light of my life, and my best friend. I have spent over half of my life with him. We have been married for 23 years, and we have been together through better and worse, sickness and health, and we have been both richer and poorer. Through all the ups and downs we have experienced in our relationship, we have continued to grow closer to one another each day.
We are both imperfect, sinful beings—we fight, we fail to be who we are supposed to be to each other all the time, but we choose each day to forgive each other, and to always love each other.
Early in our marriage, we went to a Family Life Today Marriage Conference called “I Still Do,” and it was one of the best things that could have ever happened to us. That is where we learned that our marriage is a covenant, a covenant that we made with one another and with God. It was then that we took divorce off the table as a possible outcome for our marriage, and decided no matter what would come our way we would always choose to work things out.
I don’t know about you, but I don’t just want a marriage that can survive, instead I want an abundant marriage that thrives the way God intended.
When we follow God’s plan for our life and for our marriage, we unlock the secrets to true happiness. I was convicted this week when I read Elizabeth George’s book, “A Woman After God’s Own Heart”. She reminded me of several truths from God’s word that I needed to hear and was pleasantly surprised by the outcome when I begin to really concentrate on implementing some of the truths I gleaned from her book.
One of the first things the bible says is that the role of the woman is to be a helper to the man (Genesis 1:27). The man is not supposed to be our helper. It is we women who are to help him with the works God has called him to do. I have known this for quite some time, so I truly set my mind to making sure that my husband feels loved and that I am anticipating his needs and fulfilling his desires first, and not my own.
For example, the other night we were watching television after dinner. Peter normally has control of the remote, but if he wants to watch something that I don’t want to watch, I will usually complain until I get my way! This time I chose to follow Elizabeth’s advice, and when he said do you want to watch this show, I controlled my tongue and said “sure honey, whatever you want.” In my flesh, I wanted to complain and get my own way, but that would not have been helpful to my husband at all. He has had a very stressful time at work lately, and all he really wanted was for me to sit by his side and relax and unwind. Giving in to such a little thing didn’t really cost me anything, but it truly blessed my husband.
Realizing the truth Elizabeth put forth in this wonderful book, I am on assignment from God to love my husband, and to be his helper. So today, my friend, I challenge you that after you have your time with the Lord, that the most important thing that you can do today is to love your husband by putting your preferences aside and think of him first. Joyfully serve him, and maybe you too will be surprised by how he loves you in return.