In 2000 we took a leap of faith as a family and began our homeschooling journey when we pulled Jacob out of public school after Kindergarten. We had moved into the house my husband grew up in, and Jacob went to the same elementary school that Peter did. It was very nostalgic, but I knew that God was calling me to homeschool since Jacob was three. After just a year in public school, we pulled Jacob out to homeschool him. We decided we would give homeschooling a try on year-by-year basis. Pulling Jacob out of school to homeschool during this time was a huge step of faith for our family as we were in the middle of dealing with Connor’s myriad of health problems. To complicate things even more, I found out that I was pregnant again.
Even in the midst of all of our struggles I was so excited to be pregnant again. However, this pregnancy was off to a rocky start. I began spotting again, very early on and I started having health problems from the beginning of this pregnancy. When I went to the doctor my blood tests showed that I was pregnant, and I felt very pregnant, but when we did an ultrasound we couldn’t find our baby. Something was terribly wrong. My Doctor suggested that I have laparoscopic surgery to confirm his suspicion that I had an ectopic pregnancy.
The next morning I began to hemorrhage at the surgical center. What was supposed to be a quick in-and-out laparoscopic procedure ended up being a surgery that lasted for many hours. My baby was stuck at the top of my fallopian tube and was attached to the outside of my uterus. There was no way that this baby could survive outside of my uterus and I almost died in the process. I left the surgery center that day devastated by the fact that I would never know that child on this earth, but was so thankful that God was merciful and my life was spared!
When I went back to my follow up appointment, my Doctor tried to convince me to have my tubes tied. He said I was lucky to be alive. He said that I should be thankful for the children that I had, and not to try and have any more. He said it was too dangerous. However, I had given my womb over to the Lord, and I trusted Him with my life, and the number of children I was to bear. This is not a very popular decision these days. Every time I went to the Doctor’s office, I was berated with questions about birth control. They always tried to give me contraceptives, and gave me a really hard time about the decisions that I made.
But I knew that trusting God was the right thing to do, even if it is hardly ever the popular thing to do. Trusting God takes faith. Hebrews 11:1 says “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” When we pulled Jacob out of public school, it took a leap of faith for our family, but I am so glad we did. Jacob was homeschooled all the way through high school, and got an incredible scholarship to attend HBU where he is finishing up his Junior Year. We would have never known the joy of homeschooling if we hadn’t taken a leap of faith. And if we had listened to the doctor and tied my tubes, we never would have known the joy of our third born son, Ian. Trusting God sometimes requires us to move out of our comfort zone and do things that are counter-cultural. When we step out in faith and trust God, we are in the middle of his will for us, and there is nowhere else that we would rather be.